On Thursday afternoon I flew down to the Bay Area to attend a fundraising dinner for a childhood friend. The story is sad, to say the least. About four years ago my friend Shannon's husband Joseph died in a car accident. If that wasn't enough my friend Shannon was diagnosed with col0n cancer about a year ago and after she finished her chemo therapy things didn't look any better. After a second surgery it was determined that Shannon was not going to survive, leaving behind he friends and family but most importantly her 12 year old daughter Ari and her 8 year old son Joseph. They held an auction and dinner in her honor to raise money for Shannon and her kids and although I have mostly kept up with Shannon through Kathleen I felt compelled to go. She has amazing strength and although she feels sick all the time(and often gets sick) she made it to the dinner and stayed for almost three hours where she spent the entire time greeting people who clamored to see her. I did get a hug from her and although she said she wanted to make time to talk with me there were just too many people who needed there chance to say hello (goodbye) to her. I did catch up with her sister and her mom which was nice but hard to see what they know but are not talking about. He children are amazing, they know what loss is (losing their father only 3 years ago) so I don't think they are kidding themselves when it comes to their mom but they are strong and loving individuals. I pray that God puts people in their lives that can help them through out the years because the initial loss will be VERY difficult but the hundred other losses (no mom when Ari starts her period, no mom or dad for prom, weddings and all he events that parents cheer you on through) will hit them through the years.
2 comments:
Oh man, that is so sad. It would be so hard to have that kind of party... a goodbye party. Sigh.
Pass this on if you feel it's worth it. I knew of a man who was dying in Idaho from leukemia some many years ago. It was inevitable. He knew it, his family knew it. In the meanwhile he lived life as absolutely fully, and happily as possible. He did not want to die and leave the lives of his wife and four children without a tangible part of him, so he started immediately to do the following. On a tape recorder (we used them in those days) He made a tape(or tapes) for each of his children to be listened to any time they needed their Dad. I believe they were full of not only advice and counsel, but humor too. I think he also read to them. (They were young children then)He also wrote them letters...lots of letters...to be opened at special moments of their lives - baptisms, first dates, marriages etc. As far as I know those letters and tapes were his last great project and legacy. What a great thing to do. He may have moved on to a different place, but he was able to still be very much a part of their beings.
I cannot imagine the loss this family has faced, or what they will yet face, but I know love is eternal and they will see one and other again. I just know it. I really do. I hope they do too. "Till death do us part" is such a depressing thought to me. I refuse to buy into it.
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